By Pickleball Terry
You may see someone you played with last week on the pickleball court, and you had a good game, but today he acts like he doesn’t see you. Or you call out a hello to someone and they walk right by without acknowledging you. Give them some slack. Remember, people play with many people during the week and just because you have a good memory for faces, they might not recognize you. Or the person you said hello to may have trouble hearing and simply didn’t hear you. They are not purposefully ignoring you. Why take it personally?
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I also ran into a situation recently where whenever anyone called the score, one player on the court would loudly repeat it. This was bothering my partner. “He may have the beginning stages of dementia,” I quietly said. Who knows what is going on with people? Some people are dealing with hearing problems, memory issues, anxiety, stress at home, illness, loneliness, or emotional struggles that we know nothing about.
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Pickleball courts can sometimes feel like a small town. Friendships form, routines develop, and regular players begin recognizing one another. That sense of community is one of the best parts of the sport. But with that familiarity can also come assumptions. Someone doesn’t smile back and suddenly we think they are rude. Someone declines a game and we assume they don’t like us. Someone seems distracted and we take offense.
The reality is that most of the time, it has absolutely nothing to do with us.
As we get older, many players are quietly battling things they may never openly discuss. Hearing loss is common. Vision changes are common. Early memory problems are more common than people realize. Some players are grieving the loss of a spouse. Others are worried about finances, health tests, family problems, or simply trying to make it through the day. The pickleball court may actually be the one bright spot they have.
And yet, we often judge people based on a five-second interaction.
The truth is, we rarely know the full story behind another person’s behavior. That man who seems short-tempered may have just received difficult medical news. The woman who avoids conversation may be painfully shy or struggling with depression. The player who constantly asks for the score again may not be trying to annoy anyone at all.
One of the nicest things we can bring to the courts is patience.
Pickleball is supposed to be enjoyable. It is exercise, social interaction, laughter, and escape all rolled into one. But when people become overly sensitive or quick to judge, the atmosphere changes. Resentments build over misunderstandings that were never intentional in the first place.
Instead of assuming the worst, assume something kinder.
Maybe they didn’t hear you.
Maybe they forgot your name.
Maybe they are distracted.
Maybe they are hurting.
Maybe they are just human.
Not every awkward interaction deserves a personal interpretation. Sometimes giving people grace is healthier than demanding explanations.
The pickleball community is filled with all kinds of personalities and all kinds of life stories. A little compassion can go a long way. In the end, people may not remember who won the game that morning, but they will remember how they were treated.
Thanks for reading.
Pickleball Terry